A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.
Parallel translations
- WEB A brother offended is more difficult than a fortified city; and disputes are like the bars of a fortress.
- BSB An offended brother is harder to win than a fortified city, and disputes are like the bars of a castle.
- NKJV A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city, And contentions are like the bars of a castle.
- NASB A brother who is offended is harder to be won than a strong city, And quarrels are like the bars of a citadel.
- NLT An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city. Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with bars.
Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. lockman.org
Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
Quick answer
Reconciling with an offended brother is harder than capturing a fortified city. Wounded relationships can become stubbornly entrenched.
Overview
This proverb pictures an estranged brother as more impregnable than a strong city, and quarrels as the iron bars of a fortress. It soberly recognizes how deeply offense can harden hearts and resist reconciliation. The warning underscores the wisdom of avoiding needless offense and the costly necessity of forgiveness, which the gospel both commands and empowers through the reconciling work of Christ (Eph. 4:32).
Cross-references & the web
Cross-references · 14
- Prov 16:32He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.
- Acts 15:39And the contention was so sharp between them, that they departed asunder one from the other: and so Barnabas took Mark, and sailed unto Cyprus;
- Prov 6:19A false witness that speaketh lies, and he that soweth discord among brethren.
- 1 Kgs 12:16So when all Israel saw that the king hearkened not unto them, the people answered the king, saying, What portion have we in David? neither have we inheritance in the son of Jesse: to your tents, O Israel: now see to thine own house, David. So Israel departed unto their tents.
- Gen 37:3–5Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age: and he made him a coat of many colours.
- Gen 4:5–8But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.
- Gen 27:41–45And Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing wherewith his father blessed him: and Esau said in his heart, The days of mourning for my father are at hand; then will I slay my brother Jacob.
- 2 Sam 13:22And Absalom spake unto his brother Amnon neither good nor bad: for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.
- Gen 32:6–11And the messengers returned to Jacob, saying, We came to thy brother Esau, and also he cometh to meet thee, and four hundred men with him.
- 1 Kgs 2:23–25Then king Solomon sware by the LORD, saying, God do so to me, and more also, if Adonijah have not spoken this word against his own life.
- Gen 37:18–27And when they saw him afar off, even before he came near unto them, they conspired against him to slay him.
- 2 Sam 13:28Now Absalom had commanded his servants, saying, Mark ye now when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine, and when I say unto you, Smite Amnon; then kill him, fear not: have not I commanded you? be courageous, and be valiant.
- 2 Chr 13:17And Abijah and his people slew them with a great slaughter: so there fell down slain of Israel five hundred thousand chosen men.
- Gen 37:11And his brethren envied him; but his father observed the saying.
Themes, concepts, people & topics
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Hebrew/Greek interlinear, word definitions, and cross-references for this verse.
Christ at the center
Wisdom personified, with God before creation and the agent of all things, anticipates Christ 'in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom' — the wisdom of God made flesh.
How Proverbs 18:19 points to him is part of the one story that runs through all Scripture — meet Jesus at the heart of the web, or follow a trail that traces him from Genesis to Revelation.
Original language
Each word below is tagged with its Strong’s number — tap one to see the underlying Hebrew word, its meaning, and every verse that uses it.