A brother offended is more difficult than a fortified city; and disputes are like the bars of a fortress.
Parallel translations
- KJV A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle.
- BSB An offended brother is harder to win than a fortified city, and disputes are like the bars of a castle.
- NKJV A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city, And contentions are like the bars of a castle.
- NASB A brother who is offended is harder to be won than a strong city, And quarrels are like the bars of a citadel.
- NLT An offended friend is harder to win back than a fortified city. Arguments separate friends like a gate locked with bars.
Scripture taken from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
Scripture quotations taken from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. lockman.org
Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
Quick answer
Reconciling with an offended brother is harder than capturing a fortified city. Wounded relationships can become stubbornly entrenched.
Overview
This proverb pictures an estranged brother as more impregnable than a strong city, and quarrels as the iron bars of a fortress. It soberly recognizes how deeply offense can harden hearts and resist reconciliation. The warning underscores the wisdom of avoiding needless offense and the costly necessity of forgiveness, which the gospel both commands and empowers through the reconciling work of Christ (Eph. 4:32).
Cross-references & the web
Cross-references · 14
- Prov 16:32One who is slow to anger is better than the mighty; one who rules his spirit, than he who takes a city.
- Acts 15:39Then the contention grew so sharp that they separated from each other. Barnabas took Mark with him, and sailed away to Cyprus,
- Prov 6:19a false witness who utters lies, and he who sows discord among brothers.
- 1 Kgs 12:16When all Israel saw that the king didn’t listen to them, the people answered the king, saying, “What portion have we in David? We don’t have an inheritance in the son of Jesse. To your tents, Israel! Now see to your own house, David.” So Israel departed to their tents.
- Gen 37:3–5Now Israel loved Joseph more than all his children, because he was the son of his old age, and he made him a coat of many colors.
- Gen 4:5–8but he didn’t respect Cain and his offering. Cain was very angry, and the expression on his face fell.
- Gen 27:41–45Esau hated Jacob because of the blessing with which his father blessed him. Esau said in his heart, “The days of mourning for my father are at hand. Then I will kill my brother Jacob.”
- 2 Sam 13:22Absalom spoke to Amnon neither good nor bad; for Absalom hated Amnon, because he had forced his sister Tamar.
- Gen 32:6–11The messengers returned to Jacob, saying, “We came to your brother Esau. Not only that, but he comes to meet you, and four hundred men with him.”
- 1 Kgs 2:23–25Then king Solomon swore by Yahweh, saying, “God do so to me, and more also, if Adonijah has not spoken this word against his own life.
- Gen 37:18–27They saw him afar off, and before he came near to them, they conspired against him to kill him.
- 2 Sam 13:28Absalom commanded his servants, saying, “Mark now, when Amnon’s heart is merry with wine; and when I tell you, ‘Strike Amnon,’ then kill him. Don’t be afraid. Haven’t I commanded you? Be courageous, and be valiant!”
- 2 Chr 13:17Abijah and his people killed them with a great slaughter, so five hundred thousand chosen men of Israel fell down slain.
- Gen 37:11His brothers envied him, but his father kept this saying in mind.
Themes, concepts, people & topics
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Hebrew/Greek interlinear, word definitions, and cross-references for this verse.
Christ at the center
Wisdom personified, with God before creation and the agent of all things, anticipates Christ 'in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom' — the wisdom of God made flesh.
How Proverbs 18:19 points to him is part of the one story that runs through all Scripture — meet Jesus at the heart of the web, or follow a trail that traces him from Genesis to Revelation.
Original language
Each word below is tagged with its Strong’s number — tap one to see the underlying Hebrew word, its meaning, and every verse that uses it.